Photo credit: Cari London
By HTE Founder, Erin Hughes
I grew up believing I could do it all. Attending an elite school in Melbourne, we were told from a young age that the world was ours for the taking – dream big, work hard, and nothing would be out of reach. And honestly, that belief was empowering. It gave me confidence, drive, and a fierce determination to chase every opportunity life threw my way.
But now? At 41, with four kids, multiple businesses, and a to-do list that never seems to end, I’ve got to ask – was that mindset setting us up for failure? Because, let’s be real, “doing it all” sounds great in theory, but in practice? It’s exhausting.
Sure, I thrive under pressure (hello, Type A personality), and I love the adrenaline rush of a fast-paced life. Organisation, planning, and productivity are my holy grail when it comes to keeping my world spinning. But let’s get one thing straight: no one—and I mean no one—does it all alone.
The Truth About “Doing It All”
If we’re being honest, “having it all” usually comes with a few non-negotiables:
- Some level of financial stability—because let’s face it, outsourcing help costs money.
- A nanny or regular babysitter—unless you’re a superhuman who never needs a break (spoiler: you’re not).
- An incredible village—family, friends, fellow mums who just get it.
- A supportive partner—someone who doesn’t just ‘help’ but actually shares the load.
- Time—which, let’s be honest, is the real luxury here.
- Determination, motivation, and passion—because if you’re not driven, you’ll burn out before you even begin.
And even with all of that, it’s still bloody hard.
When I was younger, I thought the goal was to juggle everything flawlessly. Now? I know better. There’s no gold medal for running yourself into the ground. No trophy for being the most exhausted, overworked, stretched-too-thin woman in the room. I get why some people opt out of the chaos. Because the truth is, “doing it all” doesn’t always mean feeling fulfilled. Sometimes, it just means feeling completely and utterly drained.
So, instead of chasing this impossible dream of being everything to everyone, I’ve shifted my mindset. It’s not about doing it all – it’s about making choices that align with who I am and what I actually want.
Here’s the real message we should have been taught back at school: it’s not about being Wonder Woman. It’s about having the freedom to choose;
If staying home with your kids full-time fills your cup, do it. If being home makes you feel like you’re losing yourself, and working is what keeps you sane, own that. If you want to (and can) do both, go for it. The key? Drop the guilt. Drop the pressure. Stop comparing. And most importantly, stop feeling like you have to justify your choices to anyone.
The one thing I also keep coming back to is, I’ve realised I actually don’t want to do everything. I want to do the things I choose to do well. With intention. With purpose. With no regrets. Because at this stage of my life, I’m at a crossroads. And the best part? I get to decide where I put my energy. I get to decide what success looks like for me.
And maybe, just maybe, the real secret isn’t about “doing it all” – it’s about doing what matters most, in a way that makes you feel alive.
