Tell us about your family. How many kids do you have?
I’m happily married and a mum to four boys: a two-month-old, a two-year-old, a four-year-old and a newly turned seven-year-old.
I genuinely feel so lucky to be living this simple life with the four kids we dreamed of, each at the stage they’re currently at. Having been through IVF and miscarriages,
I still pinch myself that they’re all here and that we get to do this life with them.
We’re painfully aware of how quickly time seems to be going, so we consciously try to enjoy all the moments, laugh at the chaos and meet the boys where they’re at. We practise co-regulation and try to lay the foundations we believe will help them grow into good men.
My husband is a business owner and I currently hold the title of “stay-at-home mum”. We both deeply value time spent together as a family. Aside from holidays, adventures and hobbies, we genuinely enjoy doing even the little, mundane things together as a family unit.
What was your biggest adjustment when becoming a mum?
I think the biggest adjustment has been the fear, head noise, mum brain, whatever you want to call it, that comes with the responsibility of raising little humans, keeping them safe and doing everything you can to help them grow into happy, grounded and respected adults.
I think I’ve changed for the better, but one of the biggest adjustments is getting to know this new and different version of yourself.
I haven’t struggled with the sleep deprivation, being outnumbered, an ever-changing body or the selflessness that comes with motherhood. What I do struggle with is being hypercritical of myself. Although motherhood feels really natural to me, I analyse and probably overthink every interaction because I’m so consumed by wanting to make the most of this fleeting time and set them up for future success.
I can get caught up thinking, this is my job and I need to get this right, whatever “right” actually looks like.
How do you manage the juggle when it comes to trying to do it all?
Motherhood has definitely made me more organised and taught me to forward plan. I utilise awake windows to make the most of outings and maximise our time outside the house.
The car is stocked with nappies, wipes, spare clothes, a footy or soccer ball, monster trucks, whatever I think they might need or whatever will make going somewhere while we’re already out easier and more enjoyable.
We finally have a visual weekly calendar alongside our annual one, mostly so I can keep track of all the sport! I always leave plenty of time to get somewhere and make sure the crew is snacked up and sorted, especially when I’m flying solo with four.
Where I can, I’ll get something organised in the morning for dinner that night so it can be on the table nice and early.
I fall short somewhere all the time, and it’s usually house-related. But that can be caught up on later, in the quiet of the night.
For me, the key is being somewhat organised for the next day, having clothes out and a mental plan, while also letting go of expectations around what you think needs to be done around the house. You have to make the most of the windows you have.
What is the best thing about being a mum?
Getting to know these little humans you created and getting to do life alongside them.
I’m honestly in awe of them. I get such a kick out of seeing them do and experience things for the first time, and I genuinely enjoy their company.
The unconditional love is the best thing for me.
What is the biggest challenge you’ve experienced as a mum?
Because of my studies in child development, I think I’ve always had a strong sense of how I want to show up as a mum. The downside is that my expectations of myself can be really high, and I find the mum guilt difficult at times.
I’m confident in the choices we make as parents and in my ability to advocate for our boys. I haven’t struggled with this new version of myself or felt a loss of identity outside of them, but the mum guilt, intrusive thoughts and constant feeling that I could be better or handle something better can become consuming.
Then there’s the expectation of meeting multiple needs at once with four kids. And I don’t mean wiping a bum while breastfeeding, because that I can do laughing!
I mean those moments when one child is sick and desperately wants Mum, but you’re tied up with another whose needs are just as urgent.
It’s the fear that not everyone is getting what they need from you.
What surprised you most about becoming a mum?
A mum’s innate ability to get on with things.
In spite of fatigue, exhaustion and all the emotions that come with it, mums can become almost superhuman in their ability to just keep going.
More recently, I’ve also been surprised by how many people feel the need to comment on the fact that I have four sons, almost as though I must feel saddened or unfulfilled by that.
The negative things strangers can say while I’m standing there with four healthy children continue to surprise me.
What do you wish you knew before becoming a mum?
I actually came back to this question because I really struggled to answer it.
I think learning as you go is part of motherhood. I didn’t feel taken aback by the demands of it, and the truth is, I like this version of me better.
If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself or other mums?
Everyone tells you it goes so fast, and it really does. But what I’ve also learnt is that with every stage that follows, there is new magic.
Initially, I think we were so keen to get to the next stage because we wanted to keep getting to know our baby and see them do more.
Now, by baby number four, I’m painfully aware of how quickly it goes and sometimes wish time would slow down. But while we’re closing the baby chapter, I know the stages ahead are going to be so cool too.
So maybe I’d say: don’t mourn what’s right in front of you.
Don’t sweat the small stuff or get too caught up in routines. Go with the flow, as they say
Do you have any tips or tricks for managing the everyday juggle?
It’s going to sound contradictory, but plan ahead and stay flexible.
Get organised for the next day the night before. Have things laid out and do whatever is going to make the morning move more smoothly. At the same time, be willing to change plans depending on moods or whatever unexpected thing inevitably happens with little kids.
Snacks, small toys and balls are always great to have on hand. Having somewhere for them to rest or “park”, like a pram loaded with everything you could possibly need, helps maximise the time you can spend out and about.
And remember that a grand, adventure-packed day isn’t necessarily more wholesome than running errands together. They just want to be with you. They want to feel seen and part of it all.
I also try to use those little pockets of time when they’re playing independently to organise something I’ll need later in the day. That becomes especially helpful when you start juggling afternoon sport schedules.
How do you manage your time between motherhood, work, your relationship and yourself?
This I definitely don’t have figured out.
I managed to complete a master’s degree with two babies under two, and I’m often referred to as “the walking degree” in my family because, while I’ve dabbled in work, I’m currently wearing the stay-at-home-mum hat.
I do feel a yearning now to find something outside motherhood that lights my fire, utilises my studies and appeals to my creative side. I’ve written some children’s books and I’m beginning to explore bringing those into the world, which feels like an exciting way to combine those parts of me.
Time for me alone is pretty much non-existent, but I’m genuinely okay with that right now. I enjoy doing a workout in the backyard with the boys close by, or having at least two of them accompany me to the rare salon appointment before an event.
I know I’ll get “my time” back soon. There will come a day when I do school drop-off and nobody will be at home with me anymore. I’ll suddenly have time to do all the things, and I’ll probably hate how quiet and calm it is.
As far as my relationship goes, I feel incredibly lucky to have the partner I do. We make sure we give each other solo time for fitness. We stay up once the house is quiet and chat. And sometimes a date is a sneaky takeaway dinner at home while everyone sleeps, or a folding-laundry party while watching something that isn’t animated.
Who is in your village that you couldn’t live without?
I feel so lucky to have a mum close by who would drop everything to help if I asked, and a sister whose children are similar ages to mine.
Then there are the friends who knew me before the boys, who have stood the test of time and different stages of life. Even when our lives looked completely different, they always wanted to know the boys and be part of our lives.
And the friends I’ve met through my children are something else.
Mums need mums ahead of them, with older kids, and mums who are right there in the same stage with them.
There is something absolutely magic about connecting with another mum through your child’s friendship and realising she’s someone you would genuinely choose as a friend yourself.
What are the five things you can’t leave home without?
I would love to be someone who is on trend, has a go-to everything and carries around beautiful products I can’t live without, but I am seriously the opposite!
I’ll grab whatever vintage bag I own that can handle having absolutely everything thrown into it, preferably something I can sling over my body or shoulder.
If I’m carrying anything at all, it’s usually for the boys. The real storage unit is the car, or the pram if we’re on foot.
The one thing I’ll always have is my phone to snap photos. It also contains a credit card my husband would probably rather I didn’t tap away with quite so freely…
What kind of holiday do you keep coming back to?
I’m not really someone who returns to the same place repeatedly. I like recreating the feeling of certain holidays, but we usually want to explore somewhere new, whether that’s overseas or a coastal camping spot where we can have a fire in the cooler months.
I will say that going to the snow annually has become something I’m so glad we started doing.
All of the boys repeatedly talk about it and look forward to it. It’s the kind of holiday I can imagine them still doing with us as they get older, and maybe one day recreating with their own families.
What do you love about travelling together?
When we’re camping, I love that if the boys aren’t in the water, they’re on their bikes from sun-up until sundown.
With overseas travel, I love exposing them to different cultures and seeing how adaptable they can be. There’s an excitement and sense of adventure to it all.
With the snow, it’s the bonding. We’re creating a shared hobby that hopefully they’ll do forever, and always together.
Travel in general is a break from routine. For me, it allows us to be really present with one another without the distractions of everyday life.
Where is at the top of your travel wish list?
With a newbie on the boobie, and after two longer European road trips in both summer and winter, I’m seeking tropical, maxo-relaxo vibes!
Somewhere the boys can tire themselves out in the water and we can balance beach and pool days with cruisy exploration.
Maybe Sri Lanka or Fiji.
What are your favourite brands and why?
I don’t think I have one specific style, so it’s hard to choose a favourite brand.
I love the motorcycle-cool vibe of Billy Bones Club tees paired with bike-style or boxer shorts, the whimsical goodness of Spell and the effortless casual style of Ottway.
I particularly love the diversity Sancia offers. They have comfy everyday knit sets that make you look put together, alongside timeless, elegant dresses that flatter different body types and can go from casual to dressy depending on how you style them.
What trend are you loving right now?
I’m not really one to follow trends, but I do love a set, if you can call that a trend!
Mostly I love that everyday comfort and effortlessness are acceptable now.
What trend can’t you get on board with?
Slick hair and looking too put together. I think it’s because I just cannot pull it off!
And maybe scrunch-bum tights.
What’s your latest brand discovery?
Laneway the Label. All the prettiness, but with throw-it-on effortlessness. The perfect combination.
And Daily Drills. Ultimate comfort meets effortless style.
Where do you do most of your fashion shopping?
Online for everyday things, but I’m definitely someone who panic-buys the day before an event and would much rather try things on.
Taking all four boys to the shops, or even two when it inevitably involves one of the spicier middle pair, is just not how I enjoy spending my days!
What does a healthy lifestyle mean to you?
Being active, being outside and having balance across everything, from food to movement.
What do you do to keep your body moving?
I have four boys under seven. My body does not stop moving!
But I’ve always loved reformer Pilates and I own a reformer. I’m also trying to get into running because it gives me some solo time, and I take our Groodle, who is a great pace for me.
My husband and I are also consciously making time for each other to fit in kettlebell workouts at home.
What are your top tips for maintaining a healthy lifestyle?
Get outside. Embed physical activity into everyday life. Find balance across everything.
Counteract a busy schedule with plenty of downtime at home. Try new things, whether that’s food, experiences or hobbies, and protect your space and time.
I think I’ve become pretty selective about who we spend our time with and how we spend it.
What are your health and wellness non-negotiables?
Daily movement, whatever that looks like. It could be a walk or a simple, quick planned workout.
For the boys, being involved in a team sport is non-negotiable. I also love Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu for the self-defence and confidence aspects, and Nippers because of where we live and the lifestyle that comes with beach activities and sport.
What does “balance” mean to you?
Right now, balance means trying to eat well while still enjoying a treat. Being physically active while making sure there’s plenty of time to chill. Travelling and having adventures, but also spending time at home.
It’s being social while protecting the time and space for us to simply be us.
