In Her Words: Vanessa Lai on Motherhood, Work & Finding Balance

An honest look at family life, ambition and the moments that matter most

Tell us about your family.

We’re a family of four — my partner Daniele, our son Marco who is 22 months old, and our fur baby Rocco, a 2½-year-old French bulldog.

What was your biggest adjustment when becoming a mum?

My business was always a huge priority and something I sacrificed a lot for. Becoming a mum forced me to split my time more evenly between work and family.

How do you manage the juggle when it comes to trying to do it all?

It’s definitely a juggle, but I’m so fortunate to have amazing support from both my family and my partner’s family. Marco is in childcare 3 days a week and my mum looks after him 1 day a week, which allows me to go into the office and dedicate that time fully to work.

What is the best thing about being a mum?

Watching my little human grow and develop every day, and seeing both myself and my partner reflected in him. Also seeing how loved he is by our family and friends — Marco truly brings so much joy to all of us.

What’s been your biggest challenge as a mum?

There are never enough hours in the day. Trying to do everything, then realising you simply can’t be everywhere at once. Learning to say no to things I would normally say yes to — and choosing not to miss out on Marco’s milestones.

What surprised you the most when becoming a mum?

How deeply you can love someone. You think you understand love with your partner, family, and friends — but having Marco showed me what unconditional love really is.

 

What do you wish you knew before becoming a mum?

That it’s okay when things don’t go the way you planned or expected. You can’t control everything, and that’s okay.

If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself or others?

Don’t regret your decisions — mistakes are how you learn. But also, don’t put up with something you know isn’t right. You only get one life, so don’t waste it.

Do you have any tips or tricks to manage the day-to-day juggle?

Having a strong support system is everything. Planning your week as much as possible also helps give structure, especially when you’re balancing work and family life.

How do you manage your time to fit in career, being a mum, relationship and time for you?

Last year, I made the tough call to sell my side of the business to a larger agency. It definitely wasn’t a decision I made overnight, I spent a lot of time weighing up the pros and cons of going back to working for someone else. In the end, it really came down to priorities.

I didn’t want to miss any of Marco’s milestones, and I wanted to be truly present when I wasn’t working. When you own your own business, it’s pretty much a 24/7 job, whereas working for someone else has given me a much better work–life balance.

It’s meant more time with my partner and friends too, which has been really important for my sanity and overall happiness.

Who is in your village and you couldn’t live without?

My partner, my mum, my family, and my best friends.

What’s in your bag you can’t leave home without:

Your favourite holiday spot?

Anywhere in Italy, it has always been a special place to me, even more so now with Daniele being from there. I recently visited Lake Como a few years ago and stayed

at the iconic Villa d’Este.

Why did you love it?

It’s absolutely magical — looking out over the lake feels almost surreal. Such a breathtaking and picturesque place.

What location is on top of your wish list to travel to next?

South of France

What is your favourite brand?

Fendi — I love their bags and especially their shoes.

The trend you’re loving right now:

Dad sneakers and chunky sandals. They’re bold but work so well with my outfits.

The trend you can’t get on board with:

Really flared pants — they look amazing on others, but I don’t think they suit me.

Your latest brand discovery:

Jelly Bean Interiors – I needed to buy a cute table & chair set for Marco and came across the most beautiful children’s furniture

Where do you do most of your fashion shopping?

Hight St Armadale, Chadstone Shopping Centre & Iconic

What does a healthy lifestyle mean to you?

Exercising regularly and eating well.

How do you keep your body moving?

Lots of walks — pushing Marco in the pram, walking Rocco, walking in the city to all my meetings

Your top tips for maintaining a healthy lifestyle:

  1. Exercising in the morning
  2. Snacking throughout the day
  3. Avoiding carbs at night
  4. Eating clean, non-processed foods
  5. Ice baths

Your non-negotiables when it comes to health and wellness:

Eating well during the week, then allowing a few cheat days on the weekend.

What does ‘balance’ mean to you?

Balance, to me, is being able to put the right energy into the right parts of my life at the right time. It’s feeling fulfilled at work without it bleeding into every hour of the day, and being able to switch off and be fully present with Marco, my partner, and the people I care about.

It’s also understanding that ambition and family don’t have to compete – they just need clear boundaries.

When those boundaries are in place, I’m a better parent, a better partner, and ultimately better at my job.