Calm in the Chaos: Building a Life That Feels Like Yours

Photographer Monika Berry on ritual, restraint and redefining balance

Tell us about your family. How Many Kids?

My husband Ray and we have two beautiful kids — Jack who’s 12 and Emily who’s 10 — plus two French bulldogs who absolutely run the house. It’s full, it’s loud, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

What’s the part of being a mum that fills you up the most?

I love watching their personalities unfold. The most beautiful part?

Realising that who they are isn’t about us — it’s about how we nurture what’s already there.

Seeing them grow into their own people, with their own quirks and qualities, is something that constantly humbles me.

What’s one thing that genuinely helps you stay afloat in the day-to-day juggle?

Waking up before everyone else. I get up early, exercise, have breakfast and map out my day before the house wakes up. When they come down, I feel calm, organised and present — not already behind. That quiet hour is everything.

How do you carve put space for career, motherhood, love, friends, and still find a moment for you?

For a long time, I lived in survival mode — work and motherhood were the only priorities. But I realised something:

if you don’t schedule the things that matter, they simply don’t happen.

So now I do exactly that. Exercise goes in the calendar. Walks. Dinners with friends. Even afternoons with no plans at all. If it matters, it gets a spot.

Where do you find fashion that genuinely feels like you?

I’m extremely brand loyal. I value quality and longevity over trends. Once a brand wins me over, I’m a walking ambassador. My favourite every season is Viktoria & Woods — their cuts just work for my body. As we’re doing this interview, I’m wearing both their pants and top. When you find pieces that just fit, you hold onto them.

What does living a healthy, grounded life look like in your world?

It’s a flow between independence and family. My work, my friendships, movement, good nutrition — they all matter. My family comes first, always.

But I’ve learnt the hard way that if I don’t prioritise my own health, everything suffers.

In the early years of motherhood, I didn’t leave time for myself. I had brain fog. I can barely remember parts of it without photos or videos. My business felt like constant hustle. The moment I prioritised my health? Everything felt lighter. Easier. More aligned.

How do you keep your body moving in a way that feels realistic and sustainable?

Most of my strength and conditioning happens before the kids wake up. I was never a morning person… until I had children. Joining the “5am club” changed everything for me.

What’s one non-negotiable that keeps your mind and body well?

Exercise. It doesn’t have to be intense — I listen to my body — but I show up consistently. It’s my mental reset.

When you think of ‘balance’, what does that actually mean to you in real life?

It’s deciding what lights you up — and making time for it. If you spend your life doing what you think you should be doing, burnout is inevitable. Balance, for me, brings joy back into the picture.

What does your morning routine look like, honestly?

Alarm at 4:45am (yes, it stings). Pilates or strength from 5:15–6am. Home for coffee and breakfast.

I check the calendar, plan the flow of the day, then it’s kids up, school prep, beds made, quick tidy, get dressed and out the door.

It’s structured — and I love that.

How do you wind down at night? What does your evening routine look like?

Once the kids are in bed, I’m on the sofa with Ray and the Frenchies. Hot chocolate in hand — currently loving WelleCo Night Elixir. Simple rituals are my favourite.

What’s something about you that would genuinely surprise people?

I’m incredibly basic. I’ve never owned a microwave. And until recently, the only kitchen appliance I owned was a blender.

What’s a truth about yourself that took you years to finally admit?

That I’m worthy of good things.

I used to have that lingering feeling that if life was going well, something would come and take it away.

It took years to work through feelings of worthiness and allow abundance without guilt.

When do you feel most like the truest version of you?

In nature. It sounds cliché, but it’s true. I’m an introvert at heart — being outdoors refuels and grounds me instantly.

What’s a single moment that quietly shifted the direction of your life?

When I was pregnant with Jack, I worked in corporate.

My Managing Director told me I was throwing my career away by having a baby.

I launched my business on maternity leave.

What’s a mistake you’re genuinely grateful you made?

Blurring the line between friendship and business.

Real friendships have come through my work — which is beautiful — but I became too emotionally invested and overdelivered. I felt taken advantage of.

It taught me that my business is its own entity. I can care deeply without carrying everything.

What’s one boundary that completely changed your life?

Detaching emotionally from my work. When I stopped tying my worth to it, I could nurture and grow it more sustainably — and without the imposter syndrome.

What part of yourself do you judge the most (if you do), and why?

I’m pragmatic. I look for solutions immediately.

I don’t always sit in discomfort long enough to let it pass — and I do the same for friends. I’m working on that.

What’s something you pretend you pretend you don’t care about, but secretly do?

A clutter-free home. Probably linked to my work — I love perfecting scenes and frames. Clean spaces calm me.

What’s something about you that people would never guess?

I grew up in commission housing, raised by a single mum as an only child until my brother was born when I was 16.

What’s a version of yourself you’re trying to become?

Healthy. Vibrant. Energised.

If you could live an entirely different life for a year, what would you choose?

Europe. My family is Austrian — I’d love to immerse us in the culture and slower way of life.

What’s something that still feels uncomfortable, but you’re pushing yourself to do anyway?

Never becoming complacent. Always learning — photography, content ideas, health, wellness. Growth matters to me.

When you think about your younger self, what do you wish she knew?

All the things you thought were reserved for “other people”? They’re available to you too.

What’s the hardest part of motherhood for you to admit out loud?

The emotional capacity it requires. Now that my kids are 10 and 12, it’s less about solving and more about listening.

I want to fix everything for them — but they need to learn and grow on their own.

That takes patience.

What’s a small joy that gets you through this season of life?

Experiencing things together. They’re old enough to hike long distances and hold real conversations — but still young enough to need us. It’s a really sweet spot.

The 5 things in your bag you can’t leave home without:

Visit, Buy, Do

Visit: Tasmania.
Buy: A new hiking backpack.
Do: The Three Bays hike.